Back in the Saddle: Everything Is Still Crazy

Finally done with a rather frantic west coast lecture tour in Oregon and Washington that kept me away from Power Line, and now I’m catching up with the news.  Now see if you can spot the true stories from the false stories.

First up, a study from a think-tank called Xegis Solutions found that beards have a direct correlation to combat effectiveness, and that the military is now considering ordering combat troops in the Army to grow facial hair.  Now, this sounds like a piece of research fit for the Journal of Irreproducable Results, but in fact it appeared on The Duffel Blog, which, is turns out, is a parody site.  So this story is false.

But, second, how about the story out of San Francisco about the deliberations by the SF Board of Supervisors about whether to ban naked dining in the city’s fine restaurants?  After long discussion, the brave Supervisors finally voted that restaurants could deny service to people in their birthday suits for hygienic reasons, disappointing the advocates who said the restaurants should supply towels for au natural customers to place under their derrieres.  Others said customers seeking a naked lunch could supply their own.  My observation is that most people already supply their own hygienic barriers to public seats: we call them “pants.”

This story is . . . true!  Here’s part of one account:

Reed’s customers might be more or less clothed, but other Castro restaurants see their share of nude diners. Burger joint Orphan Andy’s has even designated its outdoor tables the “zone of nakedness” (which, incidentally, would be a great band name).

According to the Castro Courier, local police have been getting complaints about the naked guys for a while now, and local supervisor Scott Wiener says he introduced the proposal after receiving gripes from constituents. And also, as the San Francisco Chronicle‘s City Insider blog reports, Wiener himself had a fidgety dinner recently alongside a table of nudists. . .

“In San Francisco there is no local law on public nudity; we’re guided by the California penal code that does not prohibit nudity unless you’re doing something lewd, like being aroused.”

Doesn’t he mean the penile code?  Anyway, to continue. . .

So for now, it’s legal to plop your nude ass down wherever it wants to sit in San Francisco. But if Wiener has his way (and judging from the lack of local opposition, it looks like he will), in public places like restaurants all you’ll have to do is put something down on the seat before lowering your nether parts into it.

Finally, more good news for me and my old college buddies gathered this weekend out at the beach in California for TMR XXIII (I’ll explain later): New medical research shows that drinking makes you smarter!

Drinking alcohol may enhance a person’s problem solving skills, according to a new study.

Scientists found that men who either drank two pints of beer or two glasses of wine before solving brain teasers not only got more questions right, they also were quicker in delivering correct answers, compared to men who answered the questions sober.

Another true story!  Who says the media never reports any good news?

I’ve always said sobriety is overrated.  So open another bottle of wine, sommelier.  As it happens, I’m visiting a couple of central coast wineries this afternoon.  Think I’ll bring along a Rubik’s cube or two just for kicks.

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