How about Groucho Marx for college president? Maybe instead of saying “horsefeathers!” to all the nonsense on campus, we should just do a screening of Horse Feathers. But I’m sure it would require a trigger warning.
President Groucho: “We’re neglecting football for education!”
“Where will the students sleep?” “Where they always sleep—the classroom!”
“I think you know what the trustees can do with their suggestions.”