Today, workers at Invesco Field are putting the final touches on the newest wonder of the modern political world — The Temple of Obama (“The Barackopolis”). It is upon this pulpit that Barack Obama will tomorrow night address thousands of screaming, adoring fans.
There may be some confusion among the press about the venue and appropriate dress code for Barack Obama’s big speech. To help out, we wanted to provide the following tips on appropriate attire. The toga may have gone out of style centuries ago, but after Obama’s temple speech tomorrow night, they’re sure to be flying off the racks.
The McCain campaign suggests these suitable togas:
The Nobleman: This toga is recommended for men. For celebrities and lobbyists, please add the red over toga. One should expect to see such stars as Ben Affleck dress in red robes, along with the lobbyists who fill Invesco Field’s skyboxes.
The Senator: This style is fitting for the Democratic Senators and Representatives attending Barack Obama’s big speech. We suggest the red overcoat toga with a red stripe. It is very regal and befitting of a Member of Congress in the tradition of the most distinguished Senators from antiquity.
The Traditional: This is most popular style for men and women attending tomorrow night’s speech at The Temple of Obama. Particularly popular among those “clinging” to guns and religion in the face of economic hardship, “The Traditional” is appropriate for any formal or informal event in any season.
The McCain campaign offers one last toga image as a reminder to reporters that they are expected to maintain a reasonable level of decency:
Obama’s unbounded ego, combined with his nearly non-existent achievements, may finally have led him over the cliff. That’s what Charles Krauthammer wonders: “Has He Lost His Mind?”
The Berlin folly — in English.
The Superbowl Halftime Show — without the game.
What’s the finish? Maybe Obamaâ€™s got Zhang Yimou to do the hidden-rope trick, and have him lifted, Beijing-style, to the heavens when heâ€™s done. Will he reappear three days later at the Birdâ€™s Nest?
Or maybe he’ll just do a Napoleon and coronate himself. By the time Napoleon made himself emperor, he had won the Battles of Lodi, of Arcole, of Rivoli, of the Pyramids and of Marengo. And had promugulated the Napoleonic Code. He had yet to write a single autobiography.
But of course, he was only Napoleon.
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