You know the old joke from the 1980s about how the mainstream media would cover the end of the world—the Washington Post headline would say, “World to End Tomorrow: Reagan Policies Blamed,” while the New York Times headline would read: “World To End Tomorrow: Women and Minorities Hardest Hit.” Well, so far the Puffington Host is trying to bring that parody to life with its early coverage of Paul Ryan.
First there’s the teaser headline on the AOL/PuffHo site: “Disturbing Fact About Ryan,” while the linked headline dilating this “disturbing” news is this: “Paul Ryan Only Passed 2 Bills Into Law In More Than A Decade.” Heavens! Only two laws passed! What an underachiever!
Now, a conservative will be positively reassured by this record, since most laws that are enacted are bad laws. Only a liberal (or a mainstream journalist, but I repeat myself) would find it “disturbing” that someone didn’t have a long list of laws to their name. To the contrary, anyone with a long list of laws passed is certifiably a nuisance. As George Will likes to say, pick any three letters of the alphabet out of a hat, and you’ll have the acronym for a government program we don’t need. I always used to say that my ideal representative is someone who shows up on day one, tapes his “No” button down, and leaves town to agitate against liberalism. As Barry Goldwater said in 1964, the proper aim of conservatives is to repeal laws, not pass new ones.
But wait, there’s more! This afternoon the PuffHo adds this hilarious headline: “Paul Ryan Unlikely To Play Well With Latino And Black Voters, But Matters Of Race May Not Disappear.” Really? I mean Really?? This is beyond ludicrous. It’s like the ghost of Andrew Breitbart is haunting the newsroom of the PuffHo and goading them into making complete fools of themselves. But I suspect this is just the beginning.
But in the meantime, let’s enjoy some of the good art coming out already: