Found: Stupidest Climate Change Headline Ever

From the BBC:

When relationships end it might be because the spark has disappeared, or maybe you just can’t make time for one another.

But can climate change cause break-ups? It might do, according to a new study which suggests albatrosses – some of the world’s most loyal creatures – are “divorcing” more.

Research published in the Royal Society journal looked at 15,500 breeding pairs in the Falkland Islands over 15 years. Albatross divorce is basically just cheating, in human terms. It’s when one part of a couple mates with a different individual.

Like humans, albatrosses also have an awkward growing-up phase, trying (and sometimes failing) to figure out the best way to get into a relationship. . .

Just 1% of albatrosses separate after choosing their life partner – much lower than the human divorce rate in the UK. “Monogamy and long-term bonds is very common for them,” says Francesco Ventura, researcher at the University of Lisbon and co-author of the study. But in the years covered by the study with warmer water temperatures, up to 8% of albatross couples split up.

The study says “environmentally-driven divorce may be an overlooked consequence” of climate change.

Now, we haven’t heard from the intersectional feminists yet, about the certain toxic masculinity among male albatrosses. Nor have we heard from Ibram X. Kendi about hos racism and white supremacy is responsible for the avian apocalypse.

And besides, in an age of no-fault divorce, what’s the problem?

In any case the Babylon Bee staff can go home early today. And for what it’s worth:

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