Thoughts from the ammo line

Ammo Grrrll has AN OPEN LETTER TO DON AND RON. She writes:

Dear Mr. President (45) and Governor DeSantis:

This is more or less a mash letter to both of you. With a plea that is actually a prayer. So who am I, you ask? Nobody. Not even a washed-up singer or actress tweeting semi-literate obscenities and calling everyone a Nazi. Heck, I’m not on Facebook, Twitter or even Truth Social (though I’m glad it’s there, sir…).

I am a wife, a mother, a Jewish woman, a late, late, middle-aged retired standup comic, an Arizona gun owner, two-time Trump voter, a Constitutional Conservative. I write a Friday guest column for the excellent center-right site Power Line that I know for sure, Mr. President, you are familiar with. But I feel that I represent a yuge swath of the slandered and dismissed voting population, so I would appreciate just a minute of your time, fellas, all due respect.

Governor, I would take it as a personal favor if you could find it in your heart to amble on over to Mar-a-Lago and have a sit-down with President Trump, heart to heart, no cellphones, no videos, no lawyers, no staff, just two men speaking honestly. (Heck, maybe you will find a stray cocktail napkin or birthday party menu that Merrick’s armed thugs missed and return it to the National Archives.)

Because here is what I fear most for 2024: In the both of you, we have two spectacular candidates for whom I would happily crawl over broken glass like Bruce Willis in Die Hard. And then dog-paddle across a stingray-filled moat to get to a polling place to vote for whichever one of you would emerge from the primaries. I am incredibly grateful for your contributions thus far, especially Governor DeSantis’s blows for freedom in Florida, and your wonderful four years against impossible odds, Mr. President.

But, see, that’s where the problem lies. We can absolutely count on some Democrat billionaire funding a faux Republican “Independent” in the General Election to try to ensure that the actual Conservative loses by “splitting the vote.” That is baked in the cake. The Evil Designee will be a principle-free non-entity like Murkowski, Cheney, Christie, or Kasich, but capable of doing untold damage for a sweet media gig when the sabotage operation is over. Or maybe just a wheelbarrow full of Soros cash. Maybe if he played his cards right, Christie could even get an autographed Bruce Springsteen 8 x 10 glossy “To Chris, my biggest fan. Though not quite as big as he used to be.”

However, the MAIN disaster would be a bruising Primary BETWEEN you two guys in which you each say crummy things about the other which can be made into ads for the general election. As the brilliant First Vice President Woman of Beige said after correctly calling Joe Biden a racist, “Hey, that was a DEBATE. Cackle, cackle, cackle…” We need to avoid that because it would break the hearts and the spirits of every Ultra Mega MAGA voter like me.

We are sick and tired of dutifully queuing up on Election Day to hold our noses while voting for a squishy professional loser “reach-across-the-aisles” candidate that our Chamber of Commerce betters fielded. Whose job it is to lose graciously to a leftist. It is imperative we back a WINNER. To get back to The Rule of Law, Border Control, and The Constitution.

I support President Trump as the head of the ticket and Governor DeSantis as Vice President to right the Ship of State, which is currently taking on water like the Titanic, only faster.

This time, no nice guy, Mr. President! I trust you, sir, to undo every Biden disaster you can in four years and then leave a template for a very smart and tough DeSantis to finish the Augean stable task over the next eight years. There’s no such thing as a “co-President” — even though Hillary tried to say she and Bill would be that before she got smacked down — but I would pray you two would be completely on the same page with the task ahead, tireless partners in patriotism, having each other’s backs at all times.

All that will need to be done – easy peasy lemon squeezy – is re-dominate the fossil fuel industry, refilling our empty Emergency Petroleum Reserve that Biden sold to China to lower the price of gas before the elections. Simultaneously, rebuilding the military with patriots instead of mental defectives who join to get free sex-change operations, and a couple other things I have outlined below.

To Do List First 100 Days

Count the White House silverware (watch especially for missing spoons used to cook drugs).

Check the White House paintings for amateurish swapped-out forgeries by Hunter

Move the Department of Agriculture to the smallest, most rural town in Kansas with no overpriced expense account restaurants so the government drones have to bring a bag lunch.

Disband the Department of Education altogether and reconfigure the building into a homeless shelter. Hire the former employees to tutor our children up to grade level after missing two years of school. Oh, the employees are NOT even teachers? Well, never mind, then. Let them learn to code or sell coffee in silly sizes.

Smash the Teachers’ Union. The obscene amount of money to “educate” our kids should follow the kids, not the schools. End CRT and GGN (Grotesque Gender Nonsense).

Refill the Strategic Petroleum Reserve; Drill, drill, drill, do all the frickin’ frackin’ we can handle

Call Israel to say “shalom” and assure her of unconditional support

Put ANY Climate Agreements through the shredder. Null and void. Any monies earmarked for that purpose goes straight to Law Enforcement and Border Patrol.

Close the border, build the most impregnable fence in human history, find every invader, vet them and decide who stays, who goes back, what criminals go to prison, and who goes to live in Malibu, Cape Cod, Washington, D.C. and what MS13 tykes go to bunk in at St. Nancy Pelosi’s house.

By that time, God willing, some other brilliant and conservative person will emerge to serve as Vice President for DeSantis’s two terms. Maybe a woman, maybe a person of color – Tulsi Gabbard? Kari Lake? Candace Owens? — but I don’t really care if we keep electing straight white men until long after I’m dead.

I’m all done with EVER caring about the color or shape of someone’s skin as a qualifier. The Biden Administration is the most insanely “diverse” in every regard except for competence, honesty, intelligence and business experience, and it is an unprecedented disaster. There has never been a Jewish President and you don’t see me caterwauling about it.

I give you Lori Lightfoot and Pete Buttigieg as extreme examples of what you get when you use skin color, sexual orientation or ANYTHING other than competence, honesty and ideological principles as qualities to look for in a candidate.

Boy, I bet the HUNDREDS of black people murdered by other black people in Chicago this year alone are just thrilled that their loved one was killed with a black woman with a “wife” at the helm. Put it on everybody’s tombstone, including the one for the business district in downtown Chicago. “Hey, I may be dead, but thank God, we elected a police-hating, pro-crime racist black lesbian. How historic! If only I were alive to see it!”

So come on, gentlemen. Please. I’m begging you. Help us save our beloved country by setting aside personal ambition, ego, even well-deserved revenge, and work together to “deliver us from this evil.” Blessings be upon both of you. I will do ANYTHING to help.

Susan Vass (Ammo Grrrll), Maricopa, AZ

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