In her column this morning Michelle Malkin takes a timely, sidelong glance at John Kerry through the eyes of his wife, the woman formerly known as Maria Teresa Thierstein Simoes-Ferreira.
Michelle first recalls that when she filled the unexpired portion of the term of her deceased husband Senator John Heinz, the then-Mrs. Heinz criticized Republican senatorial candidate Rick Santorum: “The ‘moderate’ Republican Heinz objected to GOP candidate Rick Santorum’s social and fiscal conservatism, branding him a ‘Forrest Gump with attitude’ who offers us ‘leadership by aphorism.’ Fumed Teh-RAY-zah: ‘We all know these types — critical of everything, impossible to please. . . . They occasionally may mean well, but the effect of even their good intentions is to destroy.'”
Michelle then asks: “Who knew she’d end up marrying exactly one of those types? Sen. John Kerry fits Heinz’s description to a T. Only he’s Forrest Gump without the charm. Watch him on the campaign trail as he stares into a TV camera, blandly reciting his sappy aphorisms: ‘We need to offer answers, not just anger. We need to offer solutions, not just slogans.’ Right. Not just slogans.”
If the sight of Democrats in high spirits has sent you in search of a laugh this morning, do pause to indulge yourself with Michelle’s column: “Howard Dean in a dress.”
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