Thoughts from the ammo line

Ammo Grrrll is not the one LYING FOR A LIVING PART DEUX. She writes:

Lordy, where to start? How ‘bout with the notion promulgated on The View that “You know who else tried to get people riled up about inflation? The Nazis!” Take that, you Nazi parents trying to fill up your tanks to drive around to multiple places searching for baby formula! Can anyone really be this stupid? The qualifications for “talent” on The View include a MINIMUM weight requirement (240 lbs.) and a MAXIMUM IQ no greater than 30 percent of their weight.

I have often said that if my bowling scores and golf scores were REVERSED I would be a professional at both sports. Similarly, if the harridans on The View switched their weights and IQs they would all be anorexic geniuses.

About 60 years ago, as a teenager watching Jack Paar, the Austrian-German émigré Lotte Lenya was a guest. She made a deep impression on me when she said inflation was so outrageous in Germany between the World Wars that companies paid their workers in cash EVERY HOUR. Then workers rushed off with their wheelbarrows full of worthless currency to buy some, ANY, tangible goods to show for their labor. Lenya recalled that she once bought a small green houseplant on her lunch hour, just to have something to point to.

So, yeah, as hard-working, middle class people watch the relentless assault on their lifestyles from $40 pot roasts and $100 SUV fill-ups, they might mention their terror over the situation. The only reasonable conclusion is that they are Nazis. Don’t they realize all they need to do is buy generic Raisin Bran? (Hey, you meat-hating Warm-Earthers, you know who else was a vegetarian? Hitler!)

But we already knew that Ultra Mega Deplorable MAGAs were semi-Nazis from being so informed by our President. Has ANYBODY located the MAGA Country racist homophobes who tortured poor Jussie with bleach and a noose in Chicago?…oh wait, I remember now…the assailants returned to Africa. I trust Jussie’s check cleared before they left. Jussie fooled Robin Roberts, Kamala Harris and professional hysteric Corey “Spartacus” Booker. Not one of them has ever admitted it was a hoax or apologized to white people or even to Republicans for the scurrilous accusations.

And now we have the “right-wing” homeless nudist addict hammer-attacker in San Francisco allegedly visiting two “Q-Anon-style” sites that appeared one day and disappeared the next! Wow! I guess they were such obvious fakes that they couldn’t even stand up to a day’s inspection by professional de-bunkers. And this on the heels of a “break-in” in Arizona of the headquarters for the losing loser Democrat candidate for Governor, an embarrassing little cowardly time-server named Katie, who won’t get in the ring with Scari Kari Lake.

And, Oh Em Gee, you guys, in a field somewhere in rural Pennsylvania MAGA vandals must have torched a Fetterman sign and then driven away like bats outta hell. Because the sign burned just far enough that a convenient on-site camera captured the aftermath but not the crime. You’d think there would be a sad pile of ash, but no, you could still see half of Fetterman’s name. (Never mind the unpunished arsonist mob that burned the Third Police Precinct in Minneapolis clear to the ground. No updates on the dozens of Pregnancy Crisis Center or Catholic Church vandalisms?)

It’s already too late for “October surprises,” having jumped the gun with the shameful yet absolutely historic leaking of the Supreme Court Decision in Dobbs. (How’s that investigation going? Have you thought of getting O.J. involved to help look for the real leaker?)

Lies, lies, and more lies as has-beens like Rob Reiner “weigh in” (and I use the verb advisedly) to blame Trump for the Paul Pelosi attack. Amy Klobuchar seconded that emotion to whine that Nancy Pelosi has been “villainized” by Trump and the right wing. Do these insufferable hacks never HEAR themselves? Who on Planet Earth has been more “villainized” in my lifetime than Donald J. Trump? RINOS, Democrats and the craven media blame conservatives for what almost certainly is either a pervy assignation gone wrong or a psychotic breakdown by a Canadian alien overstaying his visa. But only by 20 years.

Is anybody else to the point where you no longer trust ANY information? Where your default response to nearly all the news out there is “that’s probably a lie”?

Take Monkeypox – which initially we were told, everybody had an equal chance to get? Of some 28,000 U.S. monkeypox cases, only 2 percent of the infected are women. A CDC article said that even “monogamous” gay men have a “low” chance of getting or spreading it. Why not zero, you ask? Well, the CDC defines gay “monogamy” as “maybe having one outside partner a month.” Whoa! That means in 55 years of “monogamous” marriage, your husband could have had flings with 660 women. (As famous novelist Max Cossack said to me, “THAT’S the kind of monogamy many men could get behind…so to speak. Not me, of course.”) The CDC writer then admits that Monkeypox affects almost exclusively “a small number of gay men who have sex with many many many partners.”

Where are we as a society when you think a wacky MMA fighter and Podcaster like Joe Rogan probably has more trustworthy information about COVID prevention and treatment than the medical establishment? Who can trust an AMA or a CDC that utterly erases “mothers” and refers to women as “birthing persons” and nursing as “chest-feeding” so as not to hurt the feelings of a handful of mental defectives in drag?

The lies about “Climate Change” become apparent every few years as the “we only have x years left before we all die” deadlines always run out. No matter. They just come up with a new deadline. Greta Thunberg will be screeching “How dare you!?” from a nursing home in Sweden and an astonishing number of the gullible (and the profiteers) will still be worried about melting glaciers, disappearing snow and the head-smacking mystery of Arizona being hot in the summer. Thankfully, I personally will be long dead. (No more lies! No more diets!)

Science has long abandoned The Scientific Method, critical thought, and debate in favor of mandated consensus and the censoring of “disinformation.” Over 300 literary stars including, sadly, Lee Child, whose dozens of Reacher books temporarily grace my shelves (in both hardcover and paperback, sir!), have signed a document in FAVOR of censorship. Krikey!

The President of the United States, Leader of the Free World, can no longer be counted on to read a prepared sentence off a teleprompter. He cannot reliably find his way off a stage. Even most words he manages to deliver are usually slurred, unfinished, and unrecognizable as words. I figure that the White House must have an expert who is unusually good at Wheel of Fortune. He takes the garbled consonants Joe has yelled or whispered out, buys a couple vowels, and says, “I’d like to solve the puzzle now, Mr. Sajak,” and makes a stab at it for the “transcript.”

And now to return to the Gigantic Lie Du Jour. Official version: Paul was home in bed and this homeless psycho walks from Berkeley to Paul’s mansion at 2:00 a.m. He smashes a window in a door which triggered zero response from their security system. In a very large dark house, he locates Paul’s bedroom. After asking “Where’s Nancy?” and explaining his brilliant Kneecapping Plan, the psycho lets Paul go to the bathroom. In my experience, most home invaders have scheduled regular bathroom breaks for victims.

Paul evidently didn’t think just to lock that bathroom door, but his phone was charging there, so he did call the cops who arrived in two minutes. SOMEBODY let them in – a mystery third person or Jesus. But then the cops just stood around as both Paul and DePape tussled over the weapon, a hammer. Paul, 82, lost and got beat viciously before the cops could take down DePape.
So imagine the panicked discussion on how to spin this set of preposterous “facts.” Any Democrat “handlers” still alive who dealt with Chappaquiddick?

“Well, first of all, let’s say the weirdo was a MAGA guy.” “I know a guy…” “Wait, where’s the third guy? What’s he doing here? “What third guy? We’ve got to lose him pronto.” “Okay, so we’re agreed – no third guy. The cops who said that were delusional and can’t count to three.”

“Did Paul and DePape, with one hand each on the hammer, answer the door?” “Nobody answered the door. We will assert that and who will question that – the media? Hahahaha.”

“What morons can we get to say that it’s all the fault of Trump and his voters?” “Ha! Are you kidding? What morons? – ALL OF ‘EM. Somebody call Cher and Rob and Joy Reid. Alert Kinzinger, Cheney, Klobuchar, and Jen Rubin. Have the DNC say the Republicans should just abandon their campaign and hang their heads in shame. This will all work out great.”

VERY hard landing coming for the Democrats on Tuesday. Stow your tray tables and put your seats in the upright and locked position. Brace for impact. Pray ceaselessly from now till then.