A friend has forwarded us a pirated copy of the Democratic convention schedule for what appear to be the climactic festivities in Boston on July 28 or 29:
FOR THOSE OF YOU GOING TO BOSTON, HERE IS THE SCHEDULE OF EVENTS FOR THE DNC.
6:00pm – Opening flag burning ceremony.
6:00pm – Secular prayers by Rev. Jesse Jackson and Rev. Al Sharpton – collection taken during the prayer for palimony.
6:30pm – Anti-war concert by Barbra Streisand.
6:40pm – Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
7:00pm – Tribute theme to France.
7:10pm – Collect offerings for al-Zawahri defense fund.
7:25pm – Tribute theme to Germany.
7:45pm – Antiwar rally (Moderated by Michael Moore)
8:25pm – Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
8:30pm – Terrorist appeasement workshop.
9:00pm – Roundtable discussion of Taxes: “Calling for Higher Taxes on Others While You Pay None.”
9:30pm – * Intermission * Special Guest SOLOIST JANE FONDA
10:00pm – Posting the Iraqi Colors by Sean Penn.
10:10pm – Reenactment of Kerry’s fake medal toss.
10:20pm – Cameo by Dean “Yeeearrrrrrrg!”
10:30pm – Seminar: “The Boy Scouts and Other Paramilitary threats to National Security.”
10:40pm – Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
10:50pm – Pledge of allegiance to the U.N.
11:00pm – Alternative marriage ceremony.
11:15pm – Maximizing Welfare workshop.
11:30pm – “Free Saddam” pep rally.
11:50pm – Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
12:00am – Nomination of Democratic candidate.
12:01am – Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
12:02am – Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.