If you think this Halloween was scary, just imagine the House of Representatives with Nancy Pelosi back as Speaker, Mad Max Waters running the House Banking Committee, Alexandra Occasional-Cortex on the Sunday network news shows every weekend, and beta-male Beto gearing up his 2020 campaign for the alpha spot in American politics. Good times!
Headlines of the week:
News you can use:
Dumbest tweet of the week:

See—it IS a Christmas movie!

This is actually a dog carved out of wood.
And finally. . .