Go Beto! [Updated Hilariously: “I Need a Butt Shine”]

The Democrats have a remarkable number of bad presidential candidates, but I think my favorite might be Beto O’Rourke. His campaign is off to, shall we say, a rocky start. Jim Geraghty puts working-class hero Beto in context:


And this item has just emerged, courtesy of a long and gushing profile by Reuters: O’Rourke once authored a grisly fantasy about murdering children.

One day, as I was driving home from work, I noticed two children crossing the street. They were happy, happy to be free from their troubles…. This happiness was mine by right. I had earned it in my dreams.

As I neared the young ones, I put all my weight on my right foot, keeping the accelerator pedal on the floor until I heard the crashing of the two children on the hood, and then the sharp cry of pain from one of the two. I was so fascinated for a moment, that when after I had stopped my vehicle, I just sat in a daze, sweet visions filling my head.

OK, to be fair, he was only 15 at the time. But you know what they say about how children who like to torture small animals grow up. It will be fun to see how Beto answers questions about violent fantasies when we get into the primary season.

Go Beto!

UPDATE: Beto is a poet, too–an amazingly bad one. This is for real, courtesy of Robert Francis O’Rourke:


I’m not saying Beto is the worst presidential candidate in American history, but….Go Beto!

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