Every summer we are now treated to “Shark Week” on one of the cable channels, just in time for our beach vacations. And we’re also now treated to “Thermageddon Week” by the climatistas.
Every summer it seems someone discovers that it gets hot. “How hot is it?” (as the crowd would ask Johnny Carson). Always the same answer: Record heat! Climate change. Thermageddon is upon us!
These headlines are not entirely new though. For example:
The Times of India, July 17, 1928
And so it goes.
I notice one new wrinkle in this week’s breathless media coverage: there are stories about record “land temperatures.” A neat trick: Since air temperatures are no longer sufficient to get us in a panic, we’re now reporting how the sun heats up the ground. It’s so hot outside you can fry an egg on a sidewalk! (I tried it once on a black asphalt surface in Las Vegas on a 110 degree day. It didn’t work. Go ahead and Google it. Like the frog in the slowly heated pot of water, this is mostly an urban legend—like a lot of climate change reporting.)
Meanwhile, Paul Krugman is unintentionally helpful as ever:
Memo to Krugman: I think you missed this breaking news by about 30 years.
By the way, how come we always hear “weather is not climate” from the climatistas when it is cold? The “heat wave exception” to this rule of “science” must be in very fine print.
Meanwhile, the good folks at the Babylon Bee are reporting the story correctly, as usual:
Experts with the National Weather Service warned that, if left unchecked, temperatures could climb even higher, causing millions to drink more water and even go swimming. “We have never been closer to the extinction of the human race than we are right now,” said Alvin Keurig, Deputy of Dry Heat with the NWS. “Only your tax money can lower temperatures now.”
“It’s the only way,” he added solemnly.
Conservatives in Congress have reportedly pushed back against raising taxes to bring down temperatures, arguing that global temperatures will cool off in the fall like they always do. They have been branded as QAnon-adjacent conspiracy theorists.
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